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The Mail Handler

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Mary Alice
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Joined:	Mon Feb 19th, 2007
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Posted: Fri Feb 29th, 2008 09:34 pm

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The Male Handler

By Mary Alice Mark

cast of characters

4 clerks on the letter sorting machine: even as they enter, their heads and hands move in the one-a-second cycle of their work, a quick jerk to the right as hands come down to poke their key pads. As they take their seats, they add words like "swoosh," and "click," which, like their motion, continue throughout.

A Couple, also clerks: they toss bundles of envelopes from one bin (like those for laundry) into three others, (which could be off stage). Their sorting motion is also continuous and accompanied by their only words, "green," "orange" or; "yellow." We know they are a couple, because they turn the limited vocabulary and motion into a constant primordial dance and mating call.

A CLERK, moving from one work area to another

GRACIE’S MAMA: another clerk: in this area to see the show.

GRACIE: a mail handler: must walk on her hands

A Male in the SUIT: The tie must tell us something!

A Male in a BETTER SUIT: Even the tie is better!

BEST SUITED Male: Probably not Brooks Brothers, but, then-.

Setting: An area in a post office. 4 chairs are set for the actors who will make and use the machine. Four bins set the area for the couple. A float, nearly full, rests stage center.

AT RISE: THE COUPLE sorts bundles, calling their colors. The MACHINE CLERKS enter, in motion, adding voice as each takes a seat. GRACIE finishes lifting the last of the sacks and stands on her hands behind the loaded dolly. We can see her wiggling feet. CLERK starts to cross, diligently, but stops to watch. GRACIE’S MAMA enters and stands, watching The other clerks watch, but don’t stop their sounds and motion. SUIT enters.

SUIT: Get down out of there, what would the post master say if he saw you doing that!?

GRACIE: I don’t know, I’ll ask him. (Starts towards exit, still on her hands? STOPS, calling, waggling her feet.) Hey, you guys, wanna see a puppet show.

BETTER SUIT (Entering) Sure. (Crosses to "audience.")

BEST SUITED (Entering.) Wouldn’t miss it for the world. (Crosses to "audience.")

GRACIE: (Crosses to her spot behind the sacks. We see her feet, waggling.) Ladies and Gentlemen! I’m lefty, and I’m righty, and we’re here to tell you, this is the most boring job on Earth! You just have to put a new perspective to it, sometimes!

SUIT: Oh, my God! She can’t be serious!

GRACIE’S MAMA: Not often.

THE END

Last edited on Fri Feb 29th, 2008 09:36 pm by Mary Alice

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