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Deirdre
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| Joined: | Tue Mar 18th, 2008 |
| Location: | British Columbia |
| Posts: | 31 |
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Posted: Wed Mar 19th, 2008 06:52 pm |
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River: Relax.
Mrs. Chuckston: I am relaxed, it’s cold in here. What’s your name again?
River: Shhhh. River. Can you feel that?
Mrs. Chuckston: River? That’s a name?
River: My mother thought so.
Mrs. Chuckston: I don’t like my feet being touched, would you stop that?
River: Your feet are cold as icicles.
Mrs. Chuckston: I’m only here because I received a gift certificate.
River: Lucky lady. Someone loves you.
Mrs. Chuckston (snorts): Are we nearly done?
River: I’ve never seen such tightness. Does that hurt?
Mrs. Chuckston: Well I’d like to try the same on you and see - OW
River: Wish you could. Now put your head back down and try to imagine you are on a beach and that the sun is-
Mrs. Chuckston: I don’t like beaches. Sand. Sunburns. Nakedness, practically nakedness.
River: Would you mind if I undo your bra strap? We’ll only go to the level of comfort that you allow.
Mrs. Chuckston: What’s that noise? Is that a bird?
River: Yes, it’s a robin. Isn’t it pretty?
Mrs. Chuckston: It’s just past Christmas how could there be robins?
River: There aren’t really. That’s a recording. For atmosphere.
Mrs. Chuckston: Oh atmosphere. I see. Are we done yet?
River: Not yet. You’re like a board. Try to relax. Are you married Mrs. Chuckston? I guess that’s a stupid question.
Mrs. C.: Not really. I’m widowed.
River: I’m sorry.
Mrs. C.: Don’t be. We never really got along.
River. Then I am sorry. How does that feel?
Mrs. C: Slimy. What is that stuff?
River: Sesame oil.
Mrs. C.: You’re not getting it on my clothes are you?
River: Shall we take the bra off then?
Mrs. C: If you insist. I don’t want oil all over it. Don’t put it on the chair; I’m not interested in my underwear being on display.
River: It’s very private here.
Mrs. C. Put it in my shoe. Thank you. Owww. This is not working, I’m sorry I-
River: I was married once. For 4 years. I put her through nursing school, then she took off with a male doctor about a year ago. The bitch. But I can’t stay mad, she gave me lots of laughs while we were together. I’ll find someone else.
Mrs C. You’re a lesbian? Oh my god.
River: Sorry, does that shock you?
Mrs. C. I’ve got to go. Could you find me a towel, I don’t like the feeling of all this slippery...
River. Someone loves you Mrs. C. They spent good money on this. You don’t want to waste it do you?
Mrs. C: I left a fruitcake in the oven, I just remembered. I need to get out of here and get my fruitcake out of the oven.
River. Oh I love homemade fruitcakes.
MRs. C. I don’t. I only make them for the smell. I soak the cherries in brandy and cloves & when I walk in the door it smells like Christmas, doesn’t matter that no one will come, no one likes to eat fruitcake anyway, it’s the smell they like. It reminds me of when I was a girl on the farm in Saskatchewan, those were cold days and oh my the work, you don’t know about work.
River: Oh don’t I?
Mrs. C.: And the draft horses in the snow and my brother and I collecting eggs, and putting potatoes down in the root cellar in the cold room, they’re like vegetable caves in the earth, and one day he got me down there and he had stolen a piece of mama’s fruitcake and his hair smelled like cloves, his hands smelled like brandy and cloves and he made me lick them, and then he licked me, he licked me just near there where you are rubbing right now and then we had to go into Christmas dinner and I threw up right at the table and when my father looked at me, he knew something and my brother looked so sneaky and after that a few years later when I was only 16 they found me a man, they made me marry a man 25 years older than me that I didn’t even know because they said I was too ugly to get my own and I knew how ugly I was I didn’t need to be told.
RIVER. You’re not a bit ugly. You’re a handsome woman. Relax your calves, that’s the way.
Mrs. C. Look don’t you try anything. I don’t know what you think. People like you shouldn’t be in positions like this, it’s disgusting to imagine is what it is.
River. You’ve got good legs. Strong.
Mrs. C. 3 hours in the garden every day I should hope so.
River. Would you like to turn over? Would you be comfortable on your back?
Mrs. C. Absolutely not. Why did I come here, wait till I get ahold of that son of mine.
River. That son of yours must be a very considerate person. I wish I had a son.
MRs. C. My son gave me that gift certificate because he couldn’t be bothered to find out what I really wanted which was a new umbrella. ...OH.
River. Hurt?
Mrs. C. Yes. (beat) No. (beat) I don’t know. I’m hungry. I haven’t had my breakfast, I missed my breakfast because of this appointment. I always have breakfast at 9. Bananas cut up into a bowl of oatmeal. Not the instant either. If we quit now can my son get his money back?
River. No. We’re not quitting now. Just think how disappointed he would be if --
Mrs. C. My son. You know I go to my son’s house and his wife, what do you think I see, she’s left her underwear lying on the floor of their bedroom as if anyone wants to see her tiny black bras, black mind you, and silk panties that would not keep your ass warm in Saskatchewan I tell you that. (pause) Hmmm...
River. Nice?
Mrs. C. I’m thinking of my breakfast. I’m getting really hungry, I always have a banana with my oatmeal in the morning, I love the taste of banana, it’s the taste of yellow, bananas are summer, summer is lovely warm don’t you think summer is warm? I won’t have Christmas anymore, no one comes. No eats the fruitcakes. I hate the smell of cloves, can you rub me harder there? Harder. My husband and I slept in separate beds. Not because of anything to do with sex, but because he snored. Separate rooms, that’s how loud he snored. He drank himself to death. Fell right into the bottom of the bottle. And I never knew what to do with his ashes, they fell out of my hand into the bottom of the trash can so I threw them away. They’re merely ashes, only ashes. Oh don’t stop don’t stop oh stop. I’m slippery as a pig right now I am a pig.
River laughs
Mrs. C. You sound like lace when you laugh. The way lace sounds when it’s new and you’re marrying the prettiest boy on the prairie. On a shoulder, that kind of lace, that you can see through but only barely at something pale and pink, pink and pale, as lace that’s how you sound....oh. Oh. (pause) You stopped. (click) And the robin stopped too. Where’d the robin go?
River: He’s on a 45 minute timer, my robin. There. You can get dressed now.
Mrs. C. We’re done?
River. Yes. How do you feel? You’ve got a nice glow to your skin now. Relaxed? I’ll clean this up, don’t worry,
Mrs. C. Oh dear. Did I...I’m so embarrassed, I peed myself, and your table, your bench, oh I’m mortified.
River. No worries Mrs. C. I have a washing machine, that’s what it’s for. Can I help you up?
Mrs. C. (pause) Was that really 45 minutes? Thank you. I don’t know if...well... I’m sure you’re quite booked up. Are you quite booked up? (pause) Am I expected to tip you?
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muncy
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Posted: Wed Mar 19th, 2008 08:34 pm |
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My goodness, what a contradiction Mrs C is! Nice piece. Thanks for posting and welcome to the foum.
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Deirdre
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| Joined: | Tue Mar 18th, 2008 |
| Location: | British Columbia |
| Posts: | 31 |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 01:14 am |
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Thanks Muncy! Very appreciative that you read it and took the time to comment.
It was fun.
I laid out my 'props' as Paddy suggested, a black bra for visual, a teacup of sesame oil for touch, a spice jar of cloves for smell, a banana for taste and the robin outside my window. The banana came in handy when I was stuck and hungry too.
I had no idea where I would go with this, I think I went a bit overboard, but the character of Mrs C, if not the event, is based on a real life person -
I should have given some stage directions, but hey, it's just a flash and I think it's pretty obvious.
Hmmmm now I wonder if you think the character is too contradictory?
D.
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Paddy
Moderator
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 02:22 am |
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Very nice piece. One thing...felt like they weren't very far into it. Could you stretch it to fifteen and have one of those mini-massages? It all happened a bit fast.
I could hear her...like rhubarb squished between two hamburger buns.
And welcome! Another Canadian?
Paddy
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Deirdre
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| Joined: | Tue Mar 18th, 2008 |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 03:15 pm |
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Yes another Canadian, are there a few about?
Thanks Paddy
I wish I could decipher your remark, for some reason it eludes me.
Do you mean the piece should be longer and the massage shorter? Or something else entirely!?
haha
rhubarb squished between hamburger buns indeed!
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Paddy
Moderator
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 03:22 pm |
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Maybe it's just me....but if you can make a play happen in real time, it's so much more effective. So if the massage was a mini one - usually fifteen minutes...you could have a ten minute play assuming you're five minutes into the play.
The way it's written...a massage is usually an hour, and it feels as if the massage has just gotten under way....oh...never mind...I'm being nit-picky.
Paddy
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Deirdre
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 03:43 pm |
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"you could have a ten minute play assuming you're five minutes into the play."
You must mean five minutes into the massage at which I say, Gotcha! Good advice, too.
Thanks, & please be as nitpicky as you like btw. It's all part of the package and I'm grateful for the time and comments.
d
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Edd
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| Joined: | Sat Jun 10th, 2006 |
| Location: | Denver, Colorado USA |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 04:06 pm |
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Oh, Deirdre! That was truly wonderful. But sesame oil? :>)~Edd
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ohdear
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| Joined: | Tue Dec 5th, 2006 |
| Location: | Australia |
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 12:19 am |
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I VERY much enjoyed this piece.
It was SO FULL of things to feed the senses.
I loved the humour of Rivers comment....my mother seemed to think so. about her name.
Funny, but at first I thought that river was a man, being that I know a man who called himself River....so the lesbian bit threw me for a moment. But that is even BETTER.
I have to agree with ED, being massaged with Sesame Oil is IKKY.
I loved the laugh like lace thing. AND YES I did feel that Mrs C had TRANSFORMED a bit TOO MUCH for the time that had passed. I know that people can SOFTEN UP over time.....but.....I still LOVED reading it.
You drew me in and I was TOTALLY IN IT.
Thank you for this gift in my day.
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Deirdre
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| Joined: | Tue Mar 18th, 2008 |
| Location: | British Columbia |
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 01:18 am |
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Oh dear and Edd you've really made me smile, thanks so much and yes I must agree I had reservations about sesame oil but for the life of me couldn't think of the name of a more conventional massage oil, not to mention that I've been ... ahem... actually using it, oh it's kind of an ayurvedic thing, which I am not really into, but I can't resist an experiment.
Don't use the toasted kind.
hahahaha
Thank you so much, will take your comments on the character's too -quick change of heart & keep them for later.
D
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