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You Go Girl! a 10 minute play
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BillySundae
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Joined: Wed Oct 25th, 2006
Location: Lexington, Kentucky USA
Posts: 127
Status:  Offline
Mana: 
 Posted: Tue Mar 18th, 2008 02:51 am
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Your comments and suggestions are important and will be appreciated. I am hoping to enter some Version of You Go Girl in a contest that closes on March 31, so don't "spare my feelings"-- honesty from 'critics' makes for the best plays. Thanks. Bill



You Go Girl!


A ten minute play


By Bill McCann, Jr.


Characters


(in order of appearance)




Mother: 62, a woman who is scared of both her husband and the world


Stephanie: 45, a scared victim of sexual and physical abuse who is standing up


to her abuser, for the first time.


Dad: age 70, a domineering man who has physically and sexually abused


his two now grown daughters Stephanie and Alice (39).


Off Stage Voices : These should be just one or a few initially and grow in number and volume as the play progresses. They may belong to people of either gender, by play's end but should initially belong only to a woman or women.




TIME: 10 am, May 2, 1970




SETTING: The interior of a small middle class home, Kent, OH. We see two rooms: the kitchen and living room.




NOTICES:




This play is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual people or events, except the historical event of the riots on the campus of Kent State University in Kent, OH in May 1970, is both coincidental and unintentional.


You Go Girl, Page 2






AT RISE: MOTHER has her back to the audience, she is drying dishes; DAD is sitting in the living room reading. STEPHANIE comes through the kitchen door.




STEPHANIE




Hello, Mother.




MOTHER




Hello, dear. What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be teaching today?




STEPHANIE




It's Saturday, Mother.




Mayor Satrom has discussed a state of emergency for the Kent campus and surrounding areas, so even if I had any classes today, I wouldn't be able to teach them.




How's Dad?




MOTHER




Oh, you know your father. He's his grumpy old self. Why?




STEPHANIE




The campus students have inspired me-- I'm going to stand up to the son-of-a-bitch!




MOTHER




My God! What are you talking about, Steph?




STEPHANIE




Dad abused me for years. I've kept silent, long enough. I don't have a copy of the Constitution to bury, but today is the day I declare my independence!




MOTHER




Oh Steph, you can't mean that! Your dad loves you. He never did anything to you dear.




You Go Girl, Page 3






STEPHANIE




Mother, you know otherwise.




Now get out of the doorway.




MOTHER moves out of the entrance to the Living Room.




STEPHANIE (Cont)




Hello, Mr. Harshawl. How're you?




DAD




Stephanie? Mr. Hardshawl?




STEPHANIE




Yeah. Mr. Hardshawl.




You're not my dad any more. Today is my independence day.




MOTHER


(from the doorway)




You go girl.




DAD looks toward doorway. When MOTHER realizes she made her comment aloud, she goes back to doing the dishes.




DAD




Speak up. What'd you say, bitch?




STEPHANIE


(quietly, gaining strength as she goes)




I said, today is my independence day.




VOICES (off stage)




You go girl.










You Go Girl, Page 4






DAD




You been listening to too many long haired freaks over where you teach. Shit, you've been independent for 20 odd years and married for 17. Is that what this is about? You're finally leaving that no- good Fred you've been married to?




STEPHANIE




Fred's a good man. He's not the problem, you are.




DAD




I'm the problem? I'm the Problem? Bitch, you don't know what the fuck you're talking about. I put a roof over your head, fed you and cared for you like you was my very own.




STEPHANIE




I was your very own!




Why the hell did you rape me repeatedly?




DAD




Tell her Connie! Tell your bastard bitch daughter that she weren't never mine.




MOTHER enters from the Kitchen.




MOTHER




I... I'm so sorry, honey, I.....




DAD




Tell her, Godamn you, Connie!




STEPHANIE




I already knew that. It doesn't matter Mother. It also is no excuse for raping me repeatedly from the time I was 8 until I was thirteen.




DAD




I never raped you. You always wanted it.


You Go Girl, Page 5






MOTHER


(very quietly)




That isn't true Herald.




VOICES (off stage)




You go girl.




DAD




Who the fuck asked you? Go finish the godamn dishes, whore!




MOTHER exits tot the kitchen. She stops just inside the doorway, to listen.




DAD (Cont)




I see you bitch. Do the fuckin' dishes.




MOTHER turns her back on the conversation and dries dishes; she never turns around again.




STEPHANIE




Stop it! This is about me, damn it. Why the fuck did you rape me?




DAD




I didn't fuckin' rape you! You wanted it. You'd come up behind me, put your hands over my eyes and say guess who? I'd get up and chase after you, while you was gigglin' like a little girl. We was havin' fun.




STEPHANIE




That was fun-- until one day when I only had a pair of cotton undies on you caught me, threw me on the bed and rammed your finger up my vagina and asked if I liked it. I was crying and bleeding and trying to push you off me and you think I wanted that? Were you fuckin' crazy?




VOICES (off stage)




You go girl!








You Go Girl, Page 6






DAD




Of course you wanted it! Why else would you wear blue cotton undies with butterflies and nothin' else?




STEPHANIE




I was eight years old!




DAD




Damn right. Your Mother should've taught you how to dress appropriately in the presence of a real man.




STEPHANIE




Real men don't rape little girls.




DAD




You warn't no little girl. You was eight years old.




STEPHANIE




Old enough to pee, old enough for me?




DAD




Some'pin like that.




STEPHANIE




God. You're disgusting!




VOICES (off stage)




You Go Girl.




STEPHANIE




I'm leaving town. I won't be by to see you again.




VOICES (Off stage)




You go girl.




You Go Girl, Page 7






DAD




You'll be back. Next time you need a fuck, from a real man. You're Daddy's little girl and always will be.




STEPHANIE




Fred and I are going to San Francisco.




DAD




Going to join the hippie mob, are you?




STEPHANIE




Fred has a teaching job lined up. Not sure what I'll do, maybe volunteer work.




DAD




That'll sure make you wealthy. Well, don't come back here lookin' for a handout. There won't be one




STEPHANIE




Of that you can be sure. I'm not comin' back here until you're dead and buried.




VOICES (from off stage)




You go girl!




DAD




Even from the grave, I'll find a way to fuck with you little girl.




STEPHANIE




One more thing, Mr. Hardshawl.




DAD




Yeah?








You Go Girl, Page 8






VOICES (From Off Stage)




You go girl.




STEPHANIE




I'm changing my name.




DAD




Finally, divorcing Fred?




STEPHANIE




No. I'm just changing my name.




DAD




Changing it back to Hardshawl are you?




STEPHANIE




Hell no!




VOICES


(off stage and in the audience)




You go girl.




DAD




Oh?




So what's it going to be now? Bitch? Bastardess?




STEPHANIE




Goddess.




DAD




Goddess?




You Go Girl, Page 9






STEPHANIE




Goddess. Fred has made me realize I have a lot to offer. I'm smart and funny and beautiful. Goddess is what he calls me. So I'm


taking that as my new last name.




DAD




What a couple of fuckin' flakes. You was meant for each other.




STEPHANIE




Yeah, Mr. Hardshawl, we were.




VOICES


(off stage and in the audience)




You go girl!




DAD sits down, picks up his book. He ignores STEPHANIE, so she starts to leave.




STEPHANIE




Oh, one more thing, Mr Hardshawl.




DAD ignores her.




Dad?




DAD


(without anger)




Yes?




STEPHANIE




My new name will be Goddess.


(beat)


But you can call me God.




STEPHANIE exits through the kitchen door.




BLACKOUT








You Go Girl, Page 10






VOICES


(off stage and in the audience)




YOU GO GIRL!






CURTAIN-- End of Play.













muncy
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Joined: Sun Dec 31st, 2006
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom
Posts: 192
Status:  Offline
Mana: 
 Posted: Tue Mar 18th, 2008 06:29 pm
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Sorry, but this doesn't seem real to me. The anger is just there or completly absent, it doesn't build or fade. The reaction from the Mother is mild considering what her daughter is telling her, whether she already knew or not and the Father doesn't register any shock at the subject being raised after so many years.

Apart from the writing I have another problem.

I don't belive in taboos but this is a sensitive subject. Lives have been ruined and victims of child abuse have taken their own lives because of the guilt they feel (like it is their fault). I see from you other posting that this is a subject that you want to explore in your writing. My view is that if you want to write about this subject you must do it very very well and have something to say. Sorry to be brutal but I don't think this piece does that.

Hope you don't mind me being honest.

Last edited on Tue Mar 18th, 2008 06:54 pm by muncy

Michaeltw721
Member


Joined: Wed Mar 5th, 2008
Location: NYC, New York USA
Posts: 21
Status:  Offline
Mana: 
 Posted: Tue Mar 18th, 2008 07:10 pm
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I have to agree with the approach towards sensitive subjects.  I think challenging people and making them think in this medium is important, but the background needs to be thorough. 

I'm curious as to whether you read your scripts aloud?  If so, what do you gain from it?  If not, would you consider assembling a few friends/theater compatriots to do so?  I only ask because the right, though period, seems stilted and forced.  I just can't imagining some of the words and phrases you write to be honestly spoken.

That being said, keep rolling along. 

BillySundae
Member
 

Joined: Wed Oct 25th, 2006
Location: Lexington, Kentucky USA
Posts: 127
Status:  Offline
Mana: 
 Posted: Tue Mar 18th, 2008 08:47 pm
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The thing I like about this forum is that pieces don't need to be perfect to be posted. This is certainly an example. I work on plays for years before they're "finished." The play that I began with-- an adaptation of 4 short stories by Mark Twain-- was only "finished" last year and I began working on it in 1995.

I agree with much of what has been said in response to YGG. It's only the second draft and I'll plug along with it, as I have Grace, until it works or I come to the conclusion that I can never fix it (as I've also done with more than a few scripts over the years).

In the meantime, I appreciate the comments that those who have responded.

Thanks.  


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