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| Joined: | Sun Jul 2nd, 2006 |
| Location: | CHICAGO/NYC & LA On Occasion |
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Thank you for this. Loved it.
SOME THOUGHTS FOR YOU:
"ice-cold" should have a hyphen.
Also, I don't think you need the line...
"both thoughts draw me to it."
...as we know you were drawn to it because...well you are writing about it!
You can end the previous sentence of the poem with a period
Not sure if you need "I feel the surface" as we know you are touching it already with your hands.
Maybe
The surface melts
cool water runs
etc.
Lovely. I have done this exact thing...water running down arm and all, as I'm sure so many people have. Your poem about such a simple,common thing is quite thrilling.
Thanks again. I am bracing for winter already!
best,
IMR